Location: Rotterdam

I have been addicted pratically my whole life to videogames.

It was just before Christmas 2005. I was addicted to an online video game now, while I didn’t have a job or education. Talking about nights without sleep. I woke up and the first thing I did was calculating the time I could play on my brother’s pc, because I didn’t own one myself.

If I couldn’t go play, I’d check the internet for any info or whatever. Talking about killing time.

So, at that time my pastor asked our youthgroup if we wanted to do something special for the upcoming Christmans service. “Sure, I’ll make a poem” (anyway, something that rhyms) I said. Well, I made that poem which just talks about your typically general Christianity stuff. As Christmas was coming closer, I got more nerveous by the day, couse I felt I would just lie if I would recite (if that’s the right word) that poem to them people in church. The service was on Tuesday I recall, and a friend of mine invited me to come to his church on Saturday. I just prayed to God: “God, you gotta help me, you gotta do something, cause I can’t break free of it. I can’t say the words I wrote down in church. God, do something this weekend! You gotta do it!” You know, with tears in my eyes, sobbing.

I knew that this addiction was killing me, but I couldn’t break free from it.

Man, please let no man say He doesn’t hear you!

That weekend I was at my friends church, like I said. I don’t remember anything of the sermon, only that there was an altar call then. “When you really want to give your life to Jesus, but never made the decision to actually do it, when you are bound by money, sex, or (…), (…). Or by your computer,” he added outta the blue. “Then just step forward and we’re gonna pray for you.” Man, that was God talking! Pure and simple. So I got of my chair and those guys prayed for me, talked with and prayed some more. It felt good to just pour it out, you know?! Not that I saw spectular fireworks or miracles and stuff. After I came home again after the weekend I turned on the pc and cancelled registration for the game. Totally deleted everything and threw away the cd’s in case I’d ever change my mind.

My own Christmas service went well. Even got some nice comments on the poem (turned out to more like rap, though it really sucked), but those people wouldn’t know haha.

Anyway, not too long ago I bought one of those games again, played it for some time, but then threw it away again. Still struggling sometimes but I’ll get there.

What can I say? God loves us. I love Him too.